A year in which i experienced the loss of confidence, the ingrained conception of my inability, the comprehension of the selflessness of sacrifice, the departure of the one i loved, the ugliness of love, the magnitude of self-centredness, the consideration of letting go of my dreams, the loss of meaning in life, freedom but also, the sense of worthlessness and helplessness that came along with it.
a brush of cold air. freed from the barricades, which used to direct me.
free but lost. and frightened.
so many directions, one after another, or all at the same time.
confusion. and terrified.
struggled towards my dream but tied down by practicality, reponsibility, parental pressure, guilt and conventional security.
it is with this new-found freedom and much holding back that i enter the new year.
with wings, but a weight chained to my legs.
and anticipation in my blood.
scattered petals of bloodroses ; 6:41 PM
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
“Check check! My height is shorter than everyone else, but my dream is bigger than everyone else. The stage I have always dreamed of, the performances that unfold in the future. Honestly, since I’ve prepared, I am anxious; although I am very nervous, I’ve chosen to become a singer since then.” — Yoseob, MBCEvery1 Countdown Episode 2. (Yoseobians)
Inspiration for my current hairstyle, not Cleopatra or China Doll, jh. haha.
thanks for the great interest in my recent haircut and for a few unpleasant comments about it. just cos i don't conform by possessing the stereotypical hair qualities defined to be that of a "pretty" girl (long, straight or wavy/curly, honey brown or blonde hair) it doesn't mean my hairstyle is ugly.
http://herblacksmudgedfingers.imeem.com/playlist/R5k4tL-H/