Thursday, August 23, 2007

hey..
today's such a hot day. :(
i wan the rain back..

anyway,
i realised i had a lot of time to tink.
in sch, during lessons, after sch.
especially on my way back home.
i was pretty bored. emo?
mayb not.

ultimately,
tinking made me realise that i actually dont hav a reason for living.
i live for the ppl ard me, like my beloved family.
i dun live for my interests.
in fact, im kinda far away from them.

everyday, we're all doing things we dont want to do.
wats life, if for the rest of ur life, u have to live it the way u dun wan it to be?

oh. dun worry.
im not suicidal.
i still c the beauty in life. :)

i wan a simple life.
i dun mind a simple job.
but i hope my job would hav to do with the stuffs i enjoy doing.

thats y.
i ask.
y in the first place, i chose the jc.
its a bad bad choice.
coz now, im stucked.
dun hav any goal in mind.
i've no motivation to study at all.
even when 'a's are coming.
mr yeo wrote comments on my history essay.
he said "Janice, you got to work harder. dun lose it"

i laughed.
i tink i've losed "it".
how do u even define "it"?
the capability for rational thinking?
oh.
mayb he's right.

i serenade myself with wonderful music.
to bring joy back into my life. :)

i love to c u smile.
a genuine smile.
coz when u smile,
it takes away the pain from the burden u carry.