haha. as usual, i luv Fridays more than anything. :) i was really looking forward to friday. till Mr Tan suddenly told us there's compre test! :( :( ther's AQ too. arghhh. hmmm. anyway its over. and we ended early today, at 12.10am. =p
the rain is here. :) i stood at the railings and breathed in the fresh air. its really lovely and so refreshing. can feel the wind in my hair. im just taking a breather. taking a while to stop everything tat im doing and admire the scenery. ok. i may sound retarded. but ther are so many things on mind. i just need to stop and see the beauty in life. feel i can relate to the rain. it seems to be depressing, yet, being able to relate to it makes u feel tat ur not alone, tat in the midst of sadness, ther is stil such beauty. it cheers me up. thank u so much.
after the rain, it makes it the best time to sleep!! haha. i was reading. after reading, i got tired. (perhaps due to the lack of sleep, i guess) slept late and woke up early just to finish the econs assignment tat needs to be handed in today. so tired cannnn.. i laid on the sofa. and ~*..^+ dreamland. finally, no more frightening dreams, finally, able to sleep. slept for more than 4 hours. :) yay~ im refreshed.
tink im a little sicked of my blogskin. soooo, wat does it meannn?? time to changeee!! haha. been looking for nice blogskins. im a little particular, i tink. i tink i dun really like those cartoon types. i luv those artistic stuffs, involving pretty pictures. yea yea~ found some pretty ones already. now, i guess it depends on whether i am willing to take time to change everything anottt.. heh heh.
anyway... i wanna danceee. haha. nvm. smileee~ =p
scattered petals of bloodroses ; 9:14 PM
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
hmmm. i guess im handling it well.
yes. i feel like i've been cursed. everyone is like against me. (especially Mr Pang and Ms Loo) :( they scolded me. hmm. i know im in the wrong. i shud hav done my work, and not give irrelevant comments. just feeling down and sensitive. anyway, just to tel everyone, if i ever blank out or did not hear u speak or get a little moody or agitated or stuffs, im so sorry. know its not excusable. but pls, need time to get over tis.
overall, i tink i've done quite well. :) im stil able to smile. or at least remain cheerful, other than times when im tinking bout wat happened. im just trying to motivate myself to come to sch and do all my homework to keep me away from thinking. other than tat, i tink i just cant get totally over it. its stil inevitable tat i stil stone or tink a lot at times. cant get to sleep at night. i'll just lie awake on my bed and stare blankly at above. hmm. besides tat, im having horrible dreams. argh. like last night, i dremt bout terrorists. oops. Ee Chin said its just tinking too much bout history. haha. mayb.
yeah. mayb my sch is having a Valentines day concert. er, its on the day b4 v day, so tat couples can spend their precious time together on v day. excellent idea by Sharon. :) hmmm. teacher said tat vocalists would be singing on tat day!! yay~ at least teacher stil cares bout us. i guess its hard to be in his shoes, especially last yr. when the members weren't even devoted to their cca. teacher was sad. but we can make things better! promise! i'll do my best! yay~ looking forward to it. but if my singing is awful, pardon me!! =p
hmmm. i'll better not continue anymore. coz im having difficulty in forming my sentences. argh. nvm. thanksss!! bye bye~
scattered petals of bloodroses ; 8:35 PM
Sunday, January 21, 2007
blank. absolute loss of words to say.
vous importunez juste l'amour me non plus (not sure if its correct translation) -_-"
i guess u dun know. but im just losing myself. sometimes i look at myself and i dun recognise me anymore. everything. doesnt seem familiar anymore.
you said you were sad. the next thing, you tel me that ur clubbing. wth. I DUN UNDERSTAND YOU AT ALL. we were on the verge of parting and you stil have the mood to go clubbing. thanks ar. you can stil hav fun when im here spending all my time thinking bout us.
dun you ever understand? clubbing is such a complicated thing to do. its a messy place to be in. do u get it? girls dancing everywhere, around u, wif you. people go round and grop others' ass. touching each other everywhere. damn it. and you kindly told me that you are clubbing. u stil asked me if i wanna come. wat do u treat me as.
well, go ahead and hav fun. go get hooked up wif another girl. mayb u'll like it spending ur HAPPY times wif them. THEM. get it? probably, u'll get addicted wif clubbing too. u tink its a cool thing to do? no. u just dun understand the complications it involve. ur so innocent and pure in my mind. no longer anymore. i dun wanna say this. but i will nv like u anymore. even if i do. i chose to let it go.
i'll just be kind enough to let u get over with the damn hangover u'll get from drinking b4 telling u that its over. if you ever read it on this blog. den congratulations. you'll receive the news without me breaking it to u. or mayb after hearing it, u'll be happier tat way. nobody to control u, nobody to stop u from smoking, nobody to keep asking u to sleep early, nobody to quarrel u anymore. u'll finally get the freedom u wan so badly. everything tat u wan.
you know wat? i just feel like telling you to stay away from me. stop hurting me.
Battered remains of a lifeless object : the heart.
scattered petals of bloodroses ; 12:21 PM
Saturday, January 13, 2007
yiPpiEeeee~ starting it off wif an excited tone! hahah.
i know im lame! but its a new entry for the new yr. (though its like 13 days late, oops~) gotta be happy~~~
well, i realised tat most of the times, my blog entries are mainly bout sch and stuffs tat happened in sch. dong~ everything has gotta be bout sch. u know y?? coz i spend like 3/4 of my life doing stuffs relating to my studiess. e.g. being in sch, studying for tests, struggling to finish my work. other den tat, its wonderful sleeping and eattinggg.. -_-"
nevertheless, im stil gonna talk bout sch. haha. who caress. its late and i dun wanna sleep. yyy??? coz i really lack entertainment! i wanna do something else! not studying or doing homework cann. arghhh.. sch's just barely started. my first week anddddd.. im like drained. the workload is killing me. i hate it! its just schhhh.. darn. BUt! i promised to be hardworking. and i am going to be!! haha. strive for the best! =p
u know wat.? i miss a lot of people. really much. i miss my baby, my sec sch frens and sweet charlie so badly. my jc frens as well. :( fad and bobbieee.. relationsss.
nvm. love everyone. and strive towards the goal of perfection! yessshhhh..
http://herblacksmudgedfingers.imeem.com/playlist/R5k4tL-H/